Wednesday, May 31, 2006

A tiecoon in the making...

A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghanistandesert when he saw something far off in the distance.

Hoping to find water, he walked toward the object,only to find a little old Jewish man sitting at a card-table with neckties laid out on it. The Arab asked, "My thirst is killing me. Do you have water?"

The Jewish man replied, "I have no water. Would you like to buy a tie? They are only $150. This one goes very nicely with your robes."

The Arab shouted, "Idiot! I do not need an overpriced tie. I need water!"

"OK," said the old Jew, "it does not matter that you do not want to buy a tie, and that you insult me.  I will show you that you have not offended me. If you walk over that hill to the east for about two miles, you will find a lovely restaurant. Go! Walk that way! The restaurant has all the water you need!"

The Arab staggered away toward the hill and eventually disappeared.  Four hours later the Arab came crawling back to where the Jewish man was sitting at his table. The Jew said, "I told you, about two miles over that hill. Could you not find it?

"I found it all right," rasped the Arab. "Your brother won't let me in without a tie

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Depends on which side of the coin you reside.....

OK, so this was really funny to me .... (I have a sick sence of humour! )

I sent this to a mate of mine cos I saw it in our local paper in South Africa online from Dublin.

So would the Govt call on the ANC Youth League to celebrate Voortrekker Day ? or some other historical hero's from the other side of the coin ?

Call for white youth to become involved in celebrating heroes....

Johannesburg - More white youth needed to be involved in commemorating heroes of the country's past, the National Youth Commission said yesterday.

Chairman Jabu Mbalula said the organisation had not succeeded in mobilising the white youth. "As we celebrate the 30th anniversary of the June 16 Soweto uprising, the challenge is to get all the South African youth involved."

Mbalula was speaking at the launch of the 30th anniversary of the June 16 uprising, held at the Morris Isaacson High School in Soweto. The aim of the launch was to unveil the Youth Month programme, to run from June 5 to 29, under the theme "Deepening youth participation in SA's development".

He said as part of the South African history, everyone, irrespective of who they were, should be involved.

My Mates answer was .... " The only White Hero Celebrated in SA today is Father Xmas !!"

That IS Funny !!

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Shaggy .... It wasnt Me !!

OK, so you have all seen the previous posts about my new Rocket Bike ! Yep, the BLUE,Blackbird or CBR 1100XX ...... And yes, I do Live close to Drogheda...

Well, I plead the 5th or as Shaggy would say ....It wasnt ME !!!

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Best Quote Ever....

Try this one on for size....

Blaming Guns For Violence Is Like Blaming Spoons Because Rosie O'Donnel Is Fat !!

THAT IS SO FUNNY !! I Love That one......

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Views from either end of the Rainbow ....

I got two very opposing emails today. Both from ex pats. they seem to illustrate the two ends of the rainbow to me as far as the Rainbow Nation (South Africa) is concerned.


Van der Merwe had never been out of South Africa before and was visiting Bondi Beach, Australia. He spotted a long line of black dots out in the water and said to an Aussie, who was sitting close by, "What are all those little black things out there?"

"They're buoys," said the Aussie.

"Boys?!" replied Van der Merwe. "What are they doing out there?"

"Holding up the shark nets," the Aussie told him.

"F*ck%#en hell!" said the South African, deeply impressed. "We'd never get away with that at home!"

(Boys is a derogatory term for Black Labourers)

Then you have this one......

I am an African
by Wayne Visser

I am an African
Not because I was born there
But because my heart beats with Africa's
I am an African
Not because my skin is black
But because my mind is engaged by Africa
I am an African
Not because I live on its soil
But because my soul is at home in Africa
When Africa weeps for her children
My cheeks are stained with tears
When Africa honours her elders
My head is bowed in respect
When Africa mourns for her victims
My hands are joined in prayer
When Africa celebrates her triumphs
My feet are alive with dancing
I am an African
For her blue skies take my breath away
And my hope for the future is bright
I am an African
For her people greet me as family
And teach me the meaning of community
I am an African
For her wildness quenches my spirit
And brings me closer to the source of life
When the music of Africa beats in the wind
My blood pulses to its rhythm
And I become the essence of music
When the colours of Africa dazzle in the sun
My senses drink in its rainbow
And I become the palette of nature
When the stories of Africa echo round the fire
My feet walk in its pathways
And I become the footprints of history
I am an African
Because she is the cradle of our birth
And nurtures an ancient wisdom
I am an African
Because she lives in the world's shadow
And bursts with a radiant luminosity
I am an African
Because she is the land of tomorrow
And I recognise her gifts as sacred

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Summer fun....

OK, so I have had this crazy idea since I was two bricks and a ticky high..... (very young).

I wanted to tour around Europe on a motorbike !

This is quite some dream for a kid who had never ridden on a motorbike, let alone been anywhere near Europe. Stuck away in a landlocked African Country in the arse end of nowhere, overseas and especially Europe could have been just past the stand of Bluegum trees at the end of the suburb for all I knew ....
So, 30 something years go by and here I am, on Europe's doorstep the proud owner of the flashiest Super touring Motorbike of all. I have booked the Ferry ride from Ireland to France in August (courtesy of my loving wife who actually does all the online bookings - being the Techno whizz of the family...)
The bike is booked in for a service (for which we are having to take out a second mortgage), the panniers are bought and fitted, all visa requirements are taken care of, "man to man" communication is fitted to the helmets, or man to woman as the case may be ! Leave has been booked by both parties, the map has been consulted and 7 countries chosen and mapped and now the countdown really begins...

Why is it then that just thinking about this adventure of a lifetime gives me nervous butterflies in my stomach ? Its almost as if I am terrified of actually realising my dream. Am I worried that I am running out of things to aim for ? Am I worried about driving on the wrong side of the road or not speaking the local languages ? Could it be that we are doing it alone without any backup ? It is tearing me up inside and I dont know why !

I have no problem believing the Bike will do us proud, I know I am a proficient rider with many years of Superbike riding under my belt. I know My other half loves to ride with me and we travel really well together. We have places to see on our pilgrimage that we have both wanted to see all our lives....... It is going to be a great trip and Im sure Terri will photograph everything perfectly and will write a best seller blog afterwards !!

I am stil nervous....